Being laid off is a painful experience.
Even though I saw the signs and wanted a new job, having someone make that decision for me was tough.
The unexpected change, questioning why someone in leadership didn’t fight for me (especially because I was laid off after a promotion)…thinking of all the conversations leadership must have had about me, questioning my worth as an employee. These are a few of the thoughts that ran through my head in the hours and months after.
It’s been one year since I was laid off.
The title of Executive Coordinator to the CEO made me feel important. In hindsight, I should have stuck with my decision to leave that organization after dealing with anxiety from the previous role and being utterly confused by what exactly leadership was doing every day…but scarcity mindset got the best of me.
The higher I climbed in the company, the more I learned, for better or worse, and even when I started hearing rumblings of budget cuts and “difficult staff conversations,” I didn’t think my role would be impacted. After all, I spoke with leadership every single day, so I figured I’d know if my time was up.
It’s been a year since I was laid off and I’ve reclaimed my title as “Queen of the Pivot.” I’m gainfully self-employed but I often still think back to the day I was laid off. Now that the dust has finally settled, I can honestly say that there are silver linings to being laid off – it’s not toxic positivity, trust me.
I hope something about my journey resonates with you.
The silver linings of being laid off
After the initial panic, I felt a sense of relief.
Something I’d been concerned about was decided for me. I wasn’t left to deal with the aftermath of a skeleton work team (hello, increased work load) or the anxiety of wondering if I was next. Given no choice, I considered how I could pivot.
I started to question everything.
It’s difficult to see something clearly when you’re standing in the middle of it. Sometimes you have to zoom out to get a clearer picture. I started to question:
- What do I actually want to do with my life?
- What types of work interest me?
- What would happen if I focused on growing my corporate yoga business?
- What skills can I transfer to another industry?
- Can I go back to self-employment?
- What else can I do to make my house a home?
- What does rest look like for me?
I realized that all I needed was less
That promotion nearly doubled my salary, but it didn’t change how fulfilled, rested, connected or energized I felt. Money certainly makes things easier, but it can also trick you into thinking you need more than you actually do. I acknowledge that I’m speaking from a place of privilege.
My network grew
I continued to nurture my connections and share my story with people I hadn’t spoken to in years. Joining my local Chamber of Commerce helped me promote my business in real life with new people. I shine in person and I’m in my element out from behind the screen. My relationships are my greatest assets and I’m doing more now to nurture them than when I had a 9-5.
I deepened my self-exploration
I’m prioritizing my self-care and embracing the practice of slow living. I had time to consider what type of business I wanted to start and how I wanted to run it – intentional, with an abundance mindset and a schedule that aligns with my ultradian rhythms.
I’m reminded daily of this beautiful quote from Octavia F. Raheem,
“Rest can swiftly bring you to a place of clarity. Rest reveals what is yours to do and what is not. When clarity found through rest meets intention and mindful action, timelines collapse. Yes, what I am saying is that rest allows you to bend time.”
Above all, I’m remembering to rest and know my worth.
My heart is with you if you’ve been laid off. Know that it has nothing to do with you as a person, your worth or what you can offer to this world. I know that it’s scary, especially in those early days, and even if you have a good grasp on your finances and other options. Take your time and feel how you feel, mourn the loss of the hope you had when you started your job.
You don’t have to be embarrassed or question what you could have done differently because ultimately, it was not your decision to make. I’m almost certain there were steps that could have been taken to avoid the last day you sat across from HR.
Take your time and you will find your silver linings.